The Nightclub
by Bellini Girl
Summary: The Nightclub is back! Woo-hoo! If this seems a little familiar, it's because I originally published it under my old penname. But that's long gone! NOTICE TO PEDANTS: I am Neo as well as Bellini Girl, so don't write saying I'm plagiarising Neo, becau
1. And so the party begins

The Nightclub  
  
This story uses characters from the Matrix, the Matrix Reloaded, the Lord Of The Rings Trilogy, Donnie Darko and Legally Blonde. I don't own anything to do with any of those films.  
  
Chapter 1  
  
It was 8PM on Saturday 25th July. The proprietor of Club Indigo, Katie Anderson, was setting up for a themed film star evening. She'd put advertisements all over the internet inviting film characters to the event. It started at 8.30PM and she couldn't wait to see the costumes people had dreamt up.  
  
At 8.12PM there was a knock on the door which was repeated three times. Surely the first guest couldn't be here already? She opened the door to see a tall man wearing long robes about to step inside. He had a long grey beard and was carrying a wooden staff.  
  
"You're very early," she said disapprovingly as he stepped inside and removed his tall grey hat.  
  
"A wizard is never early, Katie Anderson," he said gruffly, "Nor is he late. He always arrives precisely when he means to!" And with this he went over to the fridge and started casting spells which turned the milk sour.  
  
"Wizard?" Katie was confused.  
  
"Yes. Gandalf the Grey. I was most pleasantly surprised by your notice. I haven't had a good night out in years. Centuries, in fact." He then set about turning the sour milk into yogurt.  
  
Katie was now very confused. It couldn't be - she couldn't have managed to invite a real film character, could she?  
  
"Oh, and by the way," the wizard continued, "I do hope that you have plenty of ale. I have four small friends dropping by soon and they do like their drink."  
  
Katie was about to answer when there was another knock at the door, followed by an explosion of giggles. It could only be her sister, Becky.  
  
"Hi, how's it going?" asked Becky cheerily as she opened the door. "Look who I found on the street corner!" She gestured towards a pallid dark- haired youth standing behind her next to a guy in a bunny costume. "He says his name is Donnie Darko! Isn't he cute?"  
  
"Uhh - Becky, do you know who he is?"  
  
"No. Oh, and the guy in the bunny costume is Frank. He says the funniest things."  
  
Frank stepped forward. "28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, 12 seconds," he began, "That is when the world will end. 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, 7 seconds. That is when the world will end. 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, 2 secon-"  
  
"All right!" said Katie, "I know. Now, please do not continue with the countdown to Armageddon during the party. Its a real mood-killer."  
  
There was a sudden yelp behind her. She turned round to see Gandalf being attacked by two large pieces of cheese that he had bewitched.  
  
"Hey, who's the grey-haired dude?" said Becky.  
  
"A wizard. Gandalf, please stop bewitching my groceries."  
  
"Oh, cool," said Becky, "So can Donnie stay? He won't be any trouble."  
  
"Okay. But Donnie, you must make Frank keep quiet. I don't want him depressing the other guests..."  
  
To be continued... 


	2. Spin the bottle with several dozen Agent...

Chapter 2  
  
By 9pm the club was full. Gandalf was discussing flight times with four hobbits in the corner, Legolas was preening using the reflection in the nightclub window and exchanging exfoliation tips with Elle Woods, while several Agent Smiths eyed Neo suspiciously across the room. Aragorn was chatting to Donnie and Frank about time travel and the coming Apocalypse, while Arwen was knocking back Bacardi Breezers.  
  
"So this is kinda weird," said Becky to Katie, "You know, you could have told me all these stars were coming. I would have washed my hair again."  
  
"I didn't KNOW they were coming," said Katie, "All I was expecting was a few film fanatics in costumes."  
  
They were distracted by a crash as Arwen knocked over a pile of empty bottles and staggered towards the bar to get another one.  
  
"Wow, she's really knocking them back, isn't she," said Becky.  
  
"Yeah," said Katie, "I hope she can hold her drink."  
  
"Yeah..." said Becky, noticing the Agent Smiths making eyes at her, "Gotta go!"  
  
She strode over to them and held out her empty glass, prompting a brawl as they all attempted to fill it.  
  
"Hey!"  
  
Katie turned round to see Aragorn.  
  
"Legolas and Elle are leaving to some beauty sleep," he said.  
  
"Oh," replied Katie.  
  
"So, er... you want a drink?" he asked sheepishly.  
  
"I thought you were with Arwen," Katie said, confused.  
  
"I was, but she's with someone else," he said, pointing to the corner where Arwen was draped over Neo, slurring her words. He seemed to be greatly enjoying the attention.  
  
"OK!" said Katie, "That would be great. I'll have a watermelon Bacardi please."  
  
As Aragorn went over to the bar to get her a drink, Katie glanced over at her sister. She was surrounded by at least a dozen Agent Smiths, all vying for her attention. Becky was lapping it up.  
  
"So, you're an agent for the Matrix, are you?"  
  
"Yes," said all the Smiths in unison.  
  
"Hey, can someone get me another drink?" she asked, holding up her glass.  
  
"I will," said one Agent Smith, stepping forward.  
  
"Step aside, Agent Smith," said another.  
  
"Back off, Agent Smith," said a third.  
  
"She's mine, Agent Smith," yelled another. They all drew their guns.  
  
Katie strode over to stop a riot breaking out.  
  
"Guys. Please, break it up. Break it up."  
  
"She's mine!" said all the Smiths in unison.  
  
"Oh, forget it," said Katie, turning away to be met by Donnie, who was repetitively clicking a cigarette lighter on and off.  
  
"I've gotta go. Frank told me to burn things," he said. The rabbit backed up this statement by nodding vigorously.  
  
"OK. But please don't burn anything on this property," she said.  
  
"I won't," said Donnie, walking out of the door.  
  
Frank took a deep breath. "28 days, 5 hours, 7 minutes, 29 seconds, that is when the world-"  
  
"Right - you've been warned! Get out!" said Katie, pointing at the door.  
  
Frank huffed and puffed, stopping only on the way out to give her a V-sign.  
  
"Hey! Less of that!" she yelled, walking up behind him and slamming the door.  
  
"Katie, Katie, look what Agent Smith gave me!" Becky held out her hand, which contained a beautiful gold ring. "If you hold it above a cigarette lighter, it glows. Look!" As she held the flame under it, letters in a swirling script appeared on it. Katie was worried.  
  
"Becky - which Agent Smith gave that to you?"  
  
"Errr-" She turned round. "-Oh, God knows."  
  
"Where did he get it?"  
  
"He said he got it off some kid with brown curly hair."  
  
Katie turned to see a shell-shocked Frodo sitting in the corner holding a broken silver chain. He had a look of disbelief on his face. She turned back to tell Becky to give back the One Ring, but she was once again surrounded by Agent Smiths. Katie tried to think of a distraction. 


	3. The dramatic conclusion

Chapter 3  
  
"OK everyone! Lets play Spin the Bottle!"  
  
Within ten minutes she had everyone arranged in a circle around one of the many empty Bacardi Breezer bottles.  
  
"Who wants to go first?"  
  
"I do! I do!" shouted Becky enthusiastically, grabbing a bottle and spinning it. The entire circle concentrated on the outcome - a tense atmosphere ruined only by a thump as Arwen finally fainted due to overindulgence in Bacardi rum.  
  
The bottle ground to a holt pointing towards the crowd of Agent Smiths taking up half the circle.  
  
"It pointed at me!" cried one, standing up.  
  
"No! Me!" cried another.  
  
"It was me!" shouted a third.  
  
"Me me me!" shouted a fourth.  
  
"Who did it point at?" Neo asked Katie despairingly.  
  
"Well - Agent Smith," said Katie weakly.  
  
"That settles it! I'm Agent Smith!" shouted one.  
  
"No! I'm Agent Smith!" cried another.  
  
"I'M Agent Smith!" said a third, pushing the other two aside.  
  
"Can it, you guys!" yelled Katie. "Becky, you'd better kiss all of them."  
  
"Okay!" said Becky happily, disappearing outside with a posse of Agent Smiths following her.  
  
"Wow, look at the time!" said Katie, "Its midnight! Time, everyone! Party's over!"  
  
Katie swung open the door and smelt acrid smoke. The warehouse three doors down was ablaze, and a six foot tall rabbit and a youth in a hooded top stood outside. The rabbit turned towards her and said, "28 days, 2 hours, 57 minutes, 41 seconds-"  
  
"Shut up!" screamed Katie. She glanced across the road to see a group of nine horses and black riders across the road. "Who are you waiting for?" she asked tentatively.  
  
"Baggins," hissed the rider in response as Neo carried out Arwen and dumped her in the back of a taxi, before walking over to a phone box and disappearing.  
  
"Frodo! Your friends are here!" she shouted, pushing the hobbit out of the door.  
  
"But-but-but- HELP!" yelled Frodo as the door closed behind him.  
  
Katie turned to Gandalf and Aragorn. "Right. Out!" she said, opening the back door and bunching them out of it and slamming the door.  
  
She began to tidy up the piles of empty bottles. Maybe she'd throw another one of these next year, she thought, glancing out the window and seeing Gandalf clouting a Ringwraith about the head with his staff and fire engines pulling up outside the warehouse.  
  
The End...........................................or is it? 


End file.
